The Thai Wedding, the day finally arrived......

... and passed as quickly as it approached slowly but certainly!
You know how these things go. First one thinks one has all the time, time goes slowly, then in the last week you disover all that still needs to be done..and the closer you get to the date the more it seems that need to be taken care off. Everybody who organises special events knows about this and hence we (?) who learned this lesson tend to make a 'battle-plan' and seek solution in preparing in time and planning the involved finances and unforseen expenses as well.

Well, having said this, I looked in amasement to the preparations of the Thai wedding in Si Bun Ruang. Thai are excellent organisers of parties, they really enjoy a good party, but special events like a wedding........ thats different stuff, haha.
I saw the burden on Kik and the stress he had to endure. Because Kik knows a little bit about organising and planning but his family is not too used to such excersises. So, instead that Kik could enjoy the week before his weddingday in his hometown, he was busy trying to get everything organised as he had planned to in advance..... I got the impression a lot of 'repairs' were needed and interventions to make sure all went well.l
And I have to admit, the result was impressive!! Though my husband was deadtired after the 23d, I can vow to that allright!

Instead of what I was told beforehand, the big weddingparty took place the night before the actual wedding!
The whole front before the house of Kiks grandparents was cleared and a large, high stage was constructed in the corner of the front'garden'.
KIk had told me they expected around 450 of the 900 guests to turn up... which seems to be the usual % turnout... as it happened another "unforseen" tok place, namely a good 700+ turned up to take part, as well as the next morning, the wedding itself, a good 200 attended.incredible numbers which caused sweet Kik also headaches...because all Thai, including his family, looked at hime for guidance.
Not fair, one would comment, because he was not instrumental to this high turnout, but nonetheless, he was the one getting married to a farang, which means a caucasian non thai!
Another of his problems: a farang is allways considerd rich here...and how untrue that might be, thats how farang are looked at! Ergo, also the problems of the family, allays finacial are expected to be taken care of immidiaty by the new family-in-law.
Now such things do not need to be such a problem, at least for this farang, but with the international creditcrisis it suddenly was/is!
Poor KIk, he understood al to well, but seems that the people in and around his family had a harder time with that........ they simply do not seem to look further then their local news and problems;-)
Wel, all in all, the weddingday was more then succesfull, maybe too succesfull...but an unforgettable day it has been...whatever happened afterwards!

Latest news: Didi will also be attending our Thai Wedding!!

My/our dog Didi will now also attend our weding in Si Bun Ruang.
A dear friend of Kik, and a great doglover and breeder will take care of her while travelling with the bus from Phuket to Si Bun Ruang. So, Didi will be the 5th present at our wedding who was also at uour Dutch wedding in Delft!!
(The other 4? haha Kik, me, Els and Floor)
I hope that Didi will not cause too much problems while on the bus, but I could not let her suffer another trip by airplane if its not absolutly necessary!

Logistics, another detail of our Thai wedding ... or one of Kiks nightmares?

Once I arrive in Bangkok on the 18th I’ll be happily busy
There I’ll meet some of the friends from abroad coming to attend our Thai wedding.
Now do not think in large numbers, its a humble presence but a presence for which I am very gratefull!!
A dear old friend of my mother, Ferry, announced he would attend, he is now living in Bangkok since a good part of this year and will arrive in Udon by train on the 22d. Then we have a dear friend from Australia, Don, who announced his intention to attend and I will meet him in Bangkok on the 18th or 19th. Kik and I met him and his long time partner Mike at Club OneSeven last year as well as this year end March/April and enjoyed some really good time and friendship! He is saidly travelling alone because of al the financial uncertainties right now. But we are both gratefull for the effort to be present at our weddingceremony. As he said he would represent all our Australian friends!
And then we have two dear and long time friends from Holland, Floor and Els, who will arrive at Bangkoks International Airprort on the 20th. I will try to meet them at the airport myself and they will travell to Udon on the 21st by plane.

I myself will fly out to Udon on the 21st......
The collection of these friends when they start to arrive in Udon is something which needs co-ordination on Kiks part because he needs to direct the respectieve famillymembers and friends to drive out to the airport, which is a roughly 2 hours drive from his hometown.

People are travelling to Si Bun Ruang from all over Thailand and Laos as well for our wedding. But I only know more about those travelling from Phuket:
From Simon Cabaret a 9 person strong delegation of Kiks closest friends there will travell roughly 20 hours by buscoach from Phuket to Si Bun Ruang in North East Thailand. As I understood, more would have liked to come as well, but then the shows of Simon Cabaret might get compromissen and that is something not even considered for when the country is in national mourning!
They will be joined by the staff & friends of our bar(s) here in Patong Phuket and together they wil fill one busload of 24!

If one realises that this now one day affair requires the people from Phuket to take 5/6 days off from work, simply because of the time involved traveling up and donw the country in a buscoach! They will, by the way, also act as my family on our weddingday! Cool huh?!

Next to the Phuket delegation, also a delegation of 30 will come from Bangkok. Some I probably met in the last two years while being in Bangkok with Kik, but I will discover on the 22d/23d whom I met before, haha..... it wil be a colorfull event. Thats for sure!!
But all these people, and then I am not writing here about family and friends from Kik from Laos, because those are also coming, need a place to sleep, to eat before and after the weddingday itself... that all needs to be taken care off by Kik and his family.
So transportkation, sleepingaccomodations and food and drinks for I do not know howmany people need to be organised......
Watching all of this, I am simply happy that things are much more simple in Holland. And to think that Kik never expected to have to organise his own wedding, simply because that possibility never entered his mind before..... so never thought about it before!

Next to the transport challenge of all these guests, and their food, drinks and sleeping arrangement, there is ofcourse the day itself.......the 23d of November!

Kiks weddingjitters.....

Well, after my ‘ordeal’ before the 8th of October Dutch wedding, I now see how Kik is dealing with the preparations our Thai wedding! And I feel so sorry for him, specially because I can not support him because I am unaware of all the custos involved for a proper and correct organisator of the weddingceremony and party.
Like Kik didn’t want too much involvement with our Dutch weding because of lack of knowing what can and can not be done, I now take same position for same reason.
Ofcourse, like Kik, I now only try to support him as good as I can.

But what is planned sofar, as far as I know and understand from what Kik explained to me?
Originally the idear was to have a pre-weddingparty at Kiks hometown on the eve before the 23d, but, properly to Kiks relief, his Bhuddist Master in Bangkok adviced differently and so now we will have the weddingceremony on the 23d as planed and only a weddingparty afterwards on the same day.

Kik tried to keep it a somewhat ‘small’ affair for Thai standards, I know, but as far as I understood from him, he is quite unable to keep it ‘small’. Kik has ben surprissed about all the phonecalls he has been receiving since we returned to Thailand and even more when he came back from his retreat in Temple ( Monastry) in preparathion of our Thai wedding.
All this, combined with some post election troubles to take care off , made Kik deceide to return to his home town near Udon Thani on the 14th this month, after just having been home, here in Patong, for 3 days!
So he needed to go back to Si Bun Ruang to be able to fully focus on the weddingceremony and party.
Its also pretty hard to deal with a starting business and organising this wedding so we decided to split up again and Kik went back to Si Bun Ruang while I stay on in Patong Phuket and will follow on the 18th when I go to Bangkok to meet with weddingguests there, before I follow to Udon on the 21st!

When Kik arrived back to Patong bringing back a new set of weddingclothes, he also announced a total different set of clothes will be made for us for the weddingparty afterwards... so a little surprised I tried on my set , chanmpagne white Thai silk with delicate light blue accents, I realised thats just fro a couple of hours, haha. He also showed me the design for the weddingparty clothes, which wil be much more fantasy clothes because Kik enjoys showing his theater background. So I guess with time our clothes wil grow more extravagant on the 23d!

I also understood that tables will be set up for a minimum of 400 guests for drinks and food. And I learned that not everybody will be present same time... and that makes it maybe a little bit more easy for him.... or not?
Then all the guests need to get a small souvenir from our wedding..... He told me that he ordered around 700, believing that not verbod needed to get one, couples might do with one... well, am so curious to how all will go!!
Then there’s the music....

But most scared I am about what was announced by Kik just before our Dutch wedding, that I am supposed to sing something in Thai or any other langzame for these guests, well... once I start I hope they wil not run away... it has been a while since I last managed to sing a proper sounding song and could keep myself to the lyrics.... so I pray that I have eenoog inspiration and daring to produce something decent when the time is there to do my duty akkoorden to Isaan tradition!

Kik and I are now in daily contact with eachother and while talking on the phone I try to be as supportive as I can be........
And our new business, while they have to wait till after the wedding..... right now its closed anyway for 3 days due to a three day national mourning on the ocasion of the burial of the Kings elder sister in Bangkok, and it wil also be closed for 5/6 days due to our wedding.... so November will be a more or les lost month anyway from that point of view!

A journey ‘with’ Didi (9th/10th of October)

I must say, the thing I had been most worried about preparing for Thailand and the the planeflight to it, was Didi, my dog. She was going with us and I had no idear how it would be for her, how she would manage, would she be safe, and all those worries.
I had bought an IATA approved dogkennel of a size good for Didi and put one of her more lightweighted covers and dogbench in it so she would have something of home with her in her kennel. And remeber, she never had been in such close convined quarters during her life with me, so I guess she never was in something like that ever!

Well, one thing for sure: how many dogs can say they spent their bosses weddingnight with them in one room, and come to it, when we woke up the next mornng, in one bed...guess not many, haha..... and I assure you, she likes to stretch out big time when she gets the chance to lie down with me/us on such a comfi bed!!

But we were simply to tired to be bothered with it, so we granted her the receptiën. When we arrived the precieus night at the Sheraton Hotel on Schiphol Airport, we first started to read all the wellwish cards we had received and opened up the smal gifts our friends still bought us and figuring out how to bring all of that with us to Thailand. And ofcourse we papil counted the money our guests had brought with them for us. We asked unsympathetically for money, because that would be the handiest to bring with us to Thailand and we promissed to buy from it a good and long lasting memory of our weddingday in Delft! And so we will and as soon as we have we will try to let eveybody know in gratitude what has become our weddingmemorie from our dear friends in Holland!

Okay..back to the subject at hand!
We managed to get our two very heavy and large suitcases with an overload of handluggage as early as possible to the check in counter of China Airlines..together with Didi in her IATA-kennel. We had given Didi special pills provided by Kevin, the ‘animaldocter’ and son of one of my wittnesses, Albert van Gaalen. I had hide the pills in a sausage and some meat taken from breakfast...they went in in a blink of an eye, hha..the poor girl, she must have wondered what had hit her! But how happy I was I had floret the advice of drugging her a bit!!
Okay, at the check-in counter we were confronted with a rather large overweight in bagage, excluding Didi in her kennel!!
The bill to pay for that extra weight was such that on the spot I decided to use the special offer to upgrade us to First Class, which, for the both of us, would just be 2/300 euro’s more expensive then our original seats plus overweight, haha..because flying first clas we were allowed totally 80 kilo’s instead of 60, and we had in total allmost 80.
Then I was talld that our suitcases would not be allowed to weight more then 32 kg each!! Kik by that time was not feeling to well (We had, yes yes, I know, not clever but hey it was our weddingnight, drunk ¾ bottle of champagne given to us by the Hotel management the night before. And that, combined with the short night sleep, made Kik not being on his best. I, for that matter would have liked to join him but could not allow that.... poor me, haha).... so I left Kik and rushed down to the HEMA store at the Airport to purchase an extra small suitcase to put our excess weight in and as such bring al our suitcases within the 32 kg limit. The check-in guy helped us grately and gracefully I have to admit and accompanied us after check-in with Didi in her Kennel to the special "drop off" of her so she would be attended to in the appropriate manner. And so Didi dissapeared in front of us in an elevator with a special handler..... looking at me like “what our you doing now, leaving me like this all on my own” O dear, I felt so bad!!

To make a long story a tiny bit shorter... we went on the plane a couple of hours later and Kik and I experienced our first First Class experience, and I must admit, it was something I allways wanted to experience and could not think of a better moment then on our ‘honeymoonflight’ to Thailand, the country where Kik and I are going to try to build a good life together!!
The space we enjoyed, the sleep we could have on a trough flat bed annec chair was wonderkuil. As well as the food and everything else! Haha, if this is what 50+ means and married again, well, you will not hear me complain, haha!!

After arriving in Bangkok, and cathing our connecting flight with Thai Airways, we arrived in time at Phuket Airport and collected Didi, who, by the way, was pretty drugged still when we got her out of her Kennel after she was released to enter the country without any probleem!!
By the way, booking Didi on the Thai Airways fligt costed us only 1250 bath, which is roughly betwen 25 and 30 euro’s ( roughly 1 euro per kg) and a lot, a lot cheaper then her faire for the long flight from Amsterdam, which was 30 euro’s per kg, including the kennel!! Very sympatheticaly we were not charged for any overweight on this Thai Airways flight, bless their souls!

The wedding and the camera’s... (8th of October)

The 8th of October will stay burned into my memory as one of the most warm days I ever had the pleasure to enjoy. Warm not in the sense of temperature but of spirit!!
Kik and I enjoyed the day more then we can say. Not only because contrarie to expectations it was a most beautifull and sunny Octoberday but also because of all the people who came to wittness us being married at Cityhal of Delft, The Netherlands!
For us it has been a most glorious day we will never forget.
All of my family was present, my and Kiks wittnesses as well as all our friends from all walks of life. I felt specially blessed and lucky to see my ex husband and his husband as well as other former boyfriends/lovers present and truly enjoying this day with me and for me!! We felt very very rich indeed on this day! We were very happy to see friends from my (Robs) Rijswijk-period, politically and socially, as well as from the Delft liberals and the regional Hiv Organisation, the Delft Gay Association DWH, the Saterdaymorning group as well as the saterday late afternoongroup (saterdays were allways very good and warm days in that respect!). But also all my Masonic friends from the two Delft Lodges, friends from all over the country and my oldest friendsgroup, the “dinnerclub”, who, till last month, got together at least once every three months for at least the last 28 years!!
We were esspeciay surprised to hear from the “bode” who assisted the Registrar who married Kik and me, that the weddingroom was not only totally full, but that the doors had to stay open to give everyone a change to wittness our weddingceremony.. she said that according to them there were roughly more then one hundred and twenty people present where officially max 80 were allowed to attend.
We never kissed so many people on one day, I can assure you that!!!

As soon as we left the house on Oude Delft 147, and actuele it started also a little bit before that, camera’s were klicking all the time till well in our ‘reception/afterparty’ at Bebob’s. Now we only were responsible ourselves for only two, who, on our request made a photographic and filmrecord of our wedding...but we were very surprised by al the other camera’s we have seen that day! And as such we would like to hear from every persoon who made picture or films of our day and that we are given the opportunist to enjoy the results of their labour!!

Sadly though my own camera was misplaced at Bebobs and is since then missing, including all the pics made with it!! If anyone who reads this could inform him or herself about the whereabouts of my canon camera, I would be so gratefull. It is very hard to start asking questions about its whereabouts from Thailand, so maybe one of you readers might be willing to do so!!

Goes without saying that we like to thank all who attended our weddingceremony as well as the ‘afterparty’ for making our most special day even more special and appreciated!! You all made us feel the most richest guys on the world that day and we are most gratefull for that feeling, it was the best gift that could be given to us for our wedding as well as to me for my 50th birthday!!

Special thanks goes to my Master of Ceremonies, my nephew and godson Jeroen, who not only had to take care off everything going akkoorden to plan but also had to handle me not to want to be in control al the time. He did a most splendid job and let me truly relax and enjoy this most magnificent day

As soon as it is possible I hope to place the available pictures of our wedding on my google picasso sight for all of you to enjoy. I wil give due notice when they are placed for viewing!!

Serious catching up is starting for all of you to follow

This entry is written but its placement on my weblog is somewhat delayed due to the fact that I have not been able to connect my laptop to the internet till the day this and folowing entries are actuele placed on the weerloos thaidutchmarriage or mpgsadventures. I can only hope that when it finally happens the reader won’t feel overwhelmed by all the reading overed at once at the moment of placement on either weblog. Only curious when it wil be though.......BUT when you read it I will have succeeded, haha!
AND SLOWLY WILL START DOING SOME SERIOUS CATCHING UP FOR YOU!

Pffffffff, two suitcases and a 'kennel' for Didi

Left: can you imagine this lovely face behind 'bars'?

Thats what we packed today. The whole afternoon Wilma and her daughter Dominique came to the house to help iron and pack all that we wanted to take with us when we leave for Thailand this thursday!
And O dear, how little I wanted to bring with me, but how much a little turns out to be, haha... but thats what one gets if one plans to stay a way a really long time.
And ofcourse Kik also had his stuff to take with him... and he leaves with more then he arrived with, haha.... so much a like in some repects.
We had to make sure that we keep some space in our suitcases for our wedidngdresses to be put into, because wensday we plan to leave straight for the hotel, which will be opposite the airport on Schiphol, our Dutch National Airport.
Next to most of my summerclothing, a full dress toxido, swimming and sportswear, some shoes, etc, also some of my colourfull friends needed some space, as well some gifts. Kiks suitcase was filled up likewise, and more gifts, smells, etc.
I can only pray that the weight will not disturb the check-in lady at China Airlines counter too much though, haha... well, better make sure I am not forgetting my creditcards just in case.
And then we also have to bring the kennel in which Didi will be placed during the long flight to Bangkok....uhum, kind of 'behind bars', and mostly worrried about her and the fact that she will be all alone durting that long flight!! Hope she will be okay though!!

Well, after a while, the suitcases were packed and left with Wilma and her daughter to Amsterdam to be dropped of at the hotel on the airport. The hotel promissed me that the suitcases would be brought to our room as soon as the room came available though we most likely would arrive around midnight.

Tomorrow, or maybe allready tonight, we start collecting everything for our handluggage, haha... allready curious howmuch thats going to be ;-)

Oeps, a problem... or a challenge? The bankingcrises finally catches up with...ME??

Today one of of my two wittnesses called me. He had a problem. There's a chance that he might not be in time for the weddingceremony at cityhall. He felt pretty emberrassed to have to make the call to me at all, but, according to him, some things might be out of his hands if a certain situation is becomming such a major issue that he is forced to get personally involved.
Well, I told him, that if that situation might occur, he should perform his very best, get the whole thing over and done with well in time for Cityhall, and rush to Delft to be in time, even though it would mean only 'just'. And if worse came to worse, then we would have to improvise...... whatever that might mean ;-)

Now I thought that I would relatively get trough the present banking crises quite okay, without damages... and who knows even with some luck my finacial cards might fall in such a way that when all is over I can say: MMM, well done!
BUT this effect I never suspected to happen... and if it would not be that important for me right now I could actually laugh about it... and maybe I will, on wensday itself ;-)

So, now you wonder, who is this guy? Is he a CEO of a (major?) bank? Is he CEO of an insurrance company? A mortgagebroker... nope, nothing like that... and at this moment I think he's actually happy he's in the business he is in right now..

I will not reveal his name right now.... I only know that he really will try to be there, at Cityhall... When at the airport, or after, when I arrived safe and sound in Thailand and have again time to make new entries, I might more openly say who this mysterywitness might be.... haha, and he is also not in some kind of wittnessprotectionprogram, haha, at least not yet:-))

My master of Ceremonies was on the phone earlier... he's going to contact my Registrar to see what can be done if things go bad and he is unable to appear in time to do his duty. Now I never experienced such a situation as Registrar myself in all those years I did that really very cool and wonderfull job, but I have an idear how they might solve this potential 'problem'.

Let us all hope that nothing needs to be done and all can go ahead as originally planned. And that one is not getting punnished for asking a very long time friend who happens to occupy such a demanding and public job!!

The last saterdaymorning of the Gang of Three

Links: The Gang of Three, with KIk...... Kik on the left, Next Herman, Wil and Rob.

Every saterdaymorning, well, most saterdaymornings that is, Wil, Herman and I would meet for coffee plus whatever, at Boterhuis in Delft. may it be their terrace or indoors, saterday mornings we could be found there!!
While being there we would discuss Delft and national politics and whatever we would fancy!
These last two years we discussed allmost everything, from the crises within the VVD up till the bankcrises in the USA, the consumercrises, the awareness of the gays, etc etc etc. We were, better, we are a bunch of true sincere liberals who take an active interest in whatever happens in the world!! We're not allways present when a discussion takes place within our party, but that doesn't chance a thing... we are liberal!! And gues what: Its a damn good feeling!!
This saterday was the last time we meet this way... who knows when we'll meet again like this.. I hope soon, but simply impossible to tell right now!!

The film and pictures made for our weddingday, the 8th of October!!

Right: Walking towards the filmcamera for our 'video'clip preceding the weddingmovie.

Well, we really felt a littlebit like "brrrrr, its really going to happen" when Cezar, with his assistent Theo, came to our house to make a videoclip with which Cezar wants to start our weddingmovie, which he will shoot on the day itself, ofcourse.
Sadly, friday was not the best of days for shooting a clip, the sun rarely showed itself but instead the rain was present most of the time. So we used the opportunities which presented themselfs.
I could feel that Kik also felt that it now becomes more serious, almost by the hour!
After a couple of hours feeling very cold outsite, we were happy to go back indoors.... only to go outdoors again for individual photoshoots also for the videoclip.
Am very curious to see the result, but for that we'll have to wait and see wensday first:-)) So curious, can't wait for it to happen, hehe.
BUT first have to get 50, haha

Hair...

Well, normally I do not pay too much attention to my hair, its length and how it looks.... maybe you would say: not clever, but well, also no need to really make sure it looks smart all of the time.... hehe, when I was still in office I went every 4/6 weeks.
BUT well, when one gets married one should have his hair taken care off properly... so I went to hairdresser today. Kik will go tomorrow, and will also get himself a facial when at it!
I expressed to my hairdresser, Jeannette, that I wanted an easy style, which I could easily handle but at same time looks smart, fresh and not too stiff, if you know what I mean with the use of that word, haha.
Well, everybody who comes to Delft on the 8th to visit us there on our weddingday can see for themselffs if Jeannetee succeeded in her attempt. I think, sofar, that she indeed did... more satisfied with the previous effort of 6 weeks ago!
And yes, 6 weeks ago I also went, with the simple goal of exploring the right haircut for my 50th birthday as well as weddingday.... and am happy I did, because am more satisfied now then I was 6 weeks ago!
Tomorrow Kik will go.
Kik, just asked me to let my hair grow... well, thats something that can be done...we'll talk about that later, after the 23d of November, ahha....have allways been curious if long hair would suit me or not... so it might be something to discover...
and Thailand is a good place for such an experiment!!

Clever? Doubt it...... and a visit of our Registrar

Right: "A cigarette, a cigarette, a kindom for a cigarette"

Well, very clever we were yesterday, when Kik said he wanted to quit smoking on monday, which is today, when he starts his full vegetarian period which would end on the 6th of October.
Now I allready promissed myself years ago to quit smoking on the 7th of October, the day I turn 50 years old.... So I thought, lets be supportive and quit 10 days earlier so we stop smoking together...haha, what a fun thing to do, uhum.
Kik wanted to get acupuncture treatment by Chinese Docter against smoking. This docter told that it could not stop someone from wanting to smoke but that it could help to strenghten his mind against temptations to smoke.
Well, while I am trying to finish this contribution to my weblog, I still haven't smoked, but Kik allready went for my cigars after less then 6 hoursd and bought a package of cigarettes in the early evening....but worse, smoked a cigarette out of that package in front of the house.... haha, I told him that inside it was not longer permitted to smoke (one has to do something to help the other actually getting himself to stop....). Well, one conclussion, the Chinese acupuncture didn't help much today with Kik...I believe that we have to thnk of other tricks to help him to quit! So any effective idears are most welcome!! ;-)

Well, early this afternoon we got Leja van der Hoek at the house to talk about the wedding next wensday, she will be our official Registrar. Kik was not feeling too well, some headache, easily distracted, absentminded....... quess quiting smoking today was not the most clever discission we made. The result of that talk anybody comming to delft cityhall on the 8th, will be able to see for themselfs, together with us ;-)

One major worry concerning myself: what if I start to blow up like a blowfish again in this week, simply because instead of next wensday I was so stupid to stop smoking today??? And I will not be able to fit into my weddingcostume?
O damn, Do I turn slowly crazy or is it just the pre wedding jitters?
Maybe I should go on a crash diet simultaniously to counterweigh the effects of stop smoking?

O darn, now I have new poblems to worry about, and it is allready such a lot of stuff..... haha
Clever, all in all? I doubt it! ;-)

The Marriagecontract & the day after ...... 11 days till...

Well, the first step has been made on the road to getting actually married. The first step which is not only talk talk talk but actually also doing something, in other words, finally: ACTION, action with a goal!!
Thursday Kik and I went to Westvest Notarissen here in Delft, a few minutes walk from my Delft home. I will not tell you all that happened, except that for the occasion a legally certified interpretor/translator was present to translate and explain to Kik all that was happening from Dutch into Thai.
Ofcourse, Kik and I allready talked about everything and so I was happy to discover that all was clear, no surprises for him and so everything was in accordance to what had been discussed. But it felt good to see him get everything explained and confirmed in his own language with a translation of the marriagecontract.
After all of that was esteblished and to the satisfaction of the "notaris", and ofcourse Kik and myself, we signed the contract! It felt all very official, haha
After the signing of the marriage contract, as is common here in Holland, we continued with the signing of my new Last Will & Testament, as it so nicely sounds in English I believe.

Both documents are ofcourse private and so their content will not be revealed here in my weblog... but if th sad occasion of my departure from this world into the next has arrived, some of you might find out what was written in it... and then I mean my Will ofcourse, because the marriagecontract will have no value anymore when that happens ;-)

Well... that evening we felt we made an important step and the next day we had nothing sheduled in our respective agenda's, so we decided to go, by public transport, to Batavia City , and outlet store complex near Lelystad. Last year we enjoyed going there very much and so we enjoyed the next day a pleasant trip to the same place. The weather was wonderfull, somewhat cold but very sunny, the typical autumn weather of this time of year if lucky ;-)
With loads of goodies, all stuffed in a newly bought large suitcase, we arrived happily home around 20.00 hours, tired but indeed very happy!
Batavia city can compete with Thailand when they have their sales on, and ofcourse with autumn and winter commming, all the sumergoods were on sale... so it was something like shop till you drop without loosing good common sense!

Alll in all it was more then worth the trip, and with this Batavia city excercise we finished a wonderfull week realising that we had 11/12 days left before our wedding, before us departing for Thailand!

The Last Supper......

Is there a chance that after 28 years and roughly100 meals together, a holliday and lots of evenings playing Risk and/or Black Jack, weddings and a funeral this group of friends will not come together anymore due to my leaving for a life in Thailand and so turning this dinner we had saterday the 20th of September at my house in Delft into a kind of Last Supper?
I hope not! Thats the simple and direct answer to this question about a group of friends who never stopped meeting since Erik (in the picture the guy most on the right) and I organised a 4 day trip with a tourbus and 25 people to the European Parliament at Straatsburg France in the spring of 1980. We organised that trip on behalf of the Dutch Young Liberals and during the long busride to Straatsburg and back via Germany, we, 4 guys, played a lot of Black jack, or "21-en" as we call in in Dutch. These guys were the earlier mentioned Erik, Aad (on the picture next to Erik) and Floor, the guy in the middle with the long curly hair.
After those days on the bus we decided it had been so much fun playing cards together we went on doing so when we came back home. During the years that passed since, our respective partners joined in and so our group grew to 8 all in all. Aad, as well as myself have had some changes in their partners, but Els, the wife of Floor and sitting on his left, and Ria, the wife of Erik and in this picture sitting next to Els, are as steady as participants as the original group of four!
I have allways enjoyed getting together with this group of friends, exchanging our life stories at times and troubles, but also sharing highlights together.
As such we sang together at the wedidng of Erik en Ria, after our Wintersport holliday, ergo we had ski hats on and ski's with us, even though it was a warm summer day. They all sang at my earlier wedding when I got married to my ex-husband Eric, Aad en I flew out to New york for a weekend in the eightish when Floor had to spend a series of months in Chicago, USA and enjoyed NY and a musical together. Erik at the time was unable to join on that really fun trip!
While some of us moved away out of the region of Delft, we all kept on comming together for our 3 monthly dinners, because by that time we had stopped playing games and only shared a home cooked meal together at our respective houses, where ever that house might be. So, there were years when we all had to drive long distances and stay overnight to make it all work, but we did with lots of joy and fun!

Well, I don't think us meeting will end though as our "dinner-club" as such, but the frequency will go down for sure. At least if you want to see the whole original group together. Because they allready decided to go on in the same frequency but that I simply will be excused due to the long distance to attend every time, haha, how considerate :-) But am happy because of it, thats for sure. It also means that when I know I'll be in Holland, we will all meet to continue our traditional meals together and exchange whatever there is to exchange! To follow what the respective children are doing and to support eachother when needed.
I am also convinced that I will see them all in Thailand, maybe not all at once, though they are crazy enough to do that as well one year, but individually I am very sure to be allowed to welcome them all in whatever house I might live in!

Els and Floor allready announced and decided that they are going to attend my wedding with Kik in Si Bun Ruang, Ria en Erik will only be able to decide if they are sure they have arranged their children to be taken care of in a good way. Aad is not sure yet, but then again he just has returned from a holliday with his children and boyfriend to Indonesia and Malaysia so it might prove to be too much in such a short period for him.

Whatever happens, I believe that this group of friends will only have a Last Supper when we don't know it to be as such, and thats because one of us moves to higher spheres were we can not just visit.....haha, otherwise we might go on for ever with our little dinner club without pretentions.

One advantage though by moving away to the other side of the world: we will enjoy a lot of quality time when together, and as such thats a bonus, as all people know who have moved really far away and are receiving their friends in their new homes. One never drops by for just an evening but will stay for at least several days and as such turn it into quality time together..... really look forward to these visits!!

Well for Kik this was his first time, and he was not only introduced and warmly welcomed in the group, they all really enjoyed a specially prepared vegitarian Thai meal! And believe me, they would have said otherwise if they would not have enjoyed it, because such is our group, haha, I hope!

Well, but first we will all see eachother again on the 8th of October at our wedding here in Delft! Less then 3 weeks to go.....

Master of Ceremony

When one gets married, its allways best to appoint a dear, close friend as master of ceremonies, or as some also say director of ceremonies. It gives the happy couple the chance to enjoy their day much more and freely, because on the day itself they do not have to worry anymore about anything. They have been busy with the preparations, on the day itself they should give the whole organisation into trusted hands and stop to worry if all goes as planned or envisioned. Ergo, one needs a trusted and close friend, who also knows you very very well, to take care of it all!
Well, am happy to announce to those who at all bother to read this weblog (and also my other one, see my profile to get to it) that my nephew and godson has aggreed to be my master of ceremony, Jeroen Warmerdam!
So, if anybody likes to contact him, one can email him on j.warmerdam@tygron.nl with all your questions and possible wishes for that day. He will be happy to assist you as long as it is something within his power ;-)
I do not feel free (yet) to mention his mobile number here......I leave that up to him to give it to you! If you want to contact him, use his email, I would recommend!
Jeroen is the oldest son of my sister and he himself will get married on the 29th of may next year.....an event I very much look forward to, and that is not only because he and his fiancee Bibi has asked me to officiate their marriage on that day as extraordinary registrar. And that, dear readers is very special for me!
So, a part of me hopes that all of you will let him find out which things he and Bibi have to think about organising their own wedding.... not that I like things to go wrong ofcourse on my weddingday, but one never knows if one has thought of everything till one discovers it when an eventuality does(n't) happen ;-)

What to do with Didi on the 8th.... and her journey to Thailand!

My French Basset, Didi, stuborn as stuborn can be, but also a very dear comrade over the past years, a comrade I would not like to part with, only when absolute sure she would be in the best of hands! Due to the fact that the only couple sofar who have enough trust with me to let them take care of her, had sadly enough to decline due to unfortunate circumstances. I believe should would have really liked living on a dutch farmstyle home. BUT now, as an alternative, one I also like very much by the way, she will join me on my way to Thailand with Kik.
Kik allready more or less arranged for Didi to be taken care off while we have to travell a lot trough Thailand in our first weeks while there, up till just a couple of days after our Thai wedding ceremony on the 23d of November in Si Bun Ruang in Nort East Thailand, just 120/140 south west of Udon Thani. Didi will stay with friends of us on the iland of Phuket, taken care off very well by true dog lovers!

BUT on the 8th itself, well, if all goes according to plan, my Lady in fur, hehe, will join us at Cityhall for our weddingceremony here in Delft. I can only hope and pray though that she will truely behave like a lady and less like that lovely stuborn dog she also likes to be, haha.

A bigger challenge is ofcourse what to do with her while we have our 'reception' after the wedding and while having our weddingdinner? Well, if anyone as a clever idear, we sure would like to hear of that!

We allready bought a special 'cage' for Didi to travell in to Thailand, one which is approved by IATA. I feel somewhat bad by having to teach her to stay in this so called 'kennel' and even more to put her in it when latest at the airport and arranging for her transport on the same flight as we will be on, China Airlines flight CI66 from Amsterdam to bangkok, a flight of around 12 hours. We will have to hand her over to the airline preferably around 11.30, while we will depart at 14.30 .. poor Didi, wonder how much she will hate me for that ordeal she will have to go trough..... can only hope she forgives me, us quickly!!

Ha, wel China Airlines better makes sure she gets to Bangkok safe and sound without any problems, specially to her health, or otherwise......... but am sure they know how to keep customers who fly with them as happy as possible ;-) I discovered a dog taking flight on a commercial plane, flies, from a financial point of view, in businessclass style .... though sadly for her, she will be in special animal storage elsewhere on the plane in her small 'kennel', ergo cage... and she will receive nothing of what gets close to a businessclass treatment .... but maybe for animal transport it is businessclass style. Well, can only hope she will not be put off by it all too much.... and have to make sure we do lots of happy dog things once we reached our destination!

So, in a way we will have a dear friend travelling with us on our 'honeymoon' flight to Thailand, but happy that she wil not be on our lap all that time ;-)

8th of October... whats happening?

Some would answer : "Not much", others would say: " Wow, thats a lot!"... let's say, it all depends what you are used to ;-)
One thing is for sure, the 8th of October for me will become an important day.... for me & Kik. Not only will we celebrate my 50th birthday of the day before, but also that we get (legally, for our foreign viewers) married and that I will leave for Thailand for a considerable period!
Now, how to approach such a day? Simple actually!
At 4 pm we are expected at Cityhall of Delft, part 13th, part 17th century for those interested, to get married. The wedding will be officiated by Leja van der Hoek, a city councillor of the VVD (the Dutch Liberal party) and someone who I knowallready from 30 years ago. We got reintroduced to eachother when I moved to Delft in 2006, which was a pleasant surprise!
After the ceremony in Cityhall we all, us, the then just happily married couple and all our guests, willl go to Bebob, the music/jazzbar(cafe as we say in Dutch) to cut the weddingcake, and to give everybody the chance to celebrate with us this three in one event/celebration!

Before Cityhall we will meet our family (sadly only mine will be there, Kik's family had to stay in Thailand) and our witnessses at my house on the Oude Delft, from where we will walk to the VERMEERCENTRE at the Voldersgracht (gracht = canal in english) where we will meet up with even more guests. We then all will walk from there to Cityhall for the weddingceremony.
And after the so called reception at Bebobs, which will end latest at 20.00 hours ( 3 hours is long enough, don't you think?) my close family and witnesses will again go on foot to a cozy restaurant next to Delfts Old Church. And thats all what I am going to say about that ;-)
O, and for those who are interested to know where we will sleep that night: Not at home, thats for sure!
It is our intention not to go back home anymore and we will leave for Thailand the next day or latest friday the 10th.

Well, thats all for now!
From now on I feel forced to report regurlarly here about everything happening concerning our wedding and also the preparations for our wedding in Thailand.... why? because I made this weblog public on the invitation, haha... so now I have to!
At least thats how I feel it, so no breaks anymore like this last silent period here!
Till the next entry I say: Take good care you all!

O, by the way... "the surch for" continues ;-)

And Bas Verkerk is out... not out of the closset, in case you might wonder,and be reassured he's as straight as straight can be, but he is out of the picture for officiating our wedding on te 8th due to commitments in Brussels which he can not affoid.
Well, sorry for him and us, we now have to think of somebody else again, a person which could do the ceremony in a way that would at least for a (big?) part make our day. Suggestions are allways welcome ofcourse...and I keep you posted on who the lucky guy or lady is going to be!

At the Airport, a misunderstanding .... and to the airport again!

Yesterdaymorning I was waking up early in the morning and I could not sleep anymore, a little bit like now, hehe... because I had to drive to the airport to collect Kik from his China Airlways flight CI65 from Bangkok to Amsterdam.
Being probably too excited about his arrival I could not get back to sleep anymore and so I was running about the house pretty early., again same like this morning :-)
I monitored the arrival of CI65 from Bangkok via the arrivalservice of Schiphol Airport and drove to Schiphol around 8.30, so I would be there if Kik arrived and be there in time in case of any hick-ups at pasport control and/or Customs. Remembring all too well what happened last August, that looked like the right way to do. I knew that if the plane would arrive at the right time, 09.10 am, it would be at least another 30/45 minutes before the first passengers would get trough to the waiting arria where all the other people waiting for arrivals were waiting to collect these 'new' arrivals.
And, I had no idear what happened, but the 12th seemed to be looking like the day everybody was out there to collect someone, so busy it was.
I bought two balloons, one with "Welcome back" on it and one in the shape of a big flower with a yellow smiley....and so my waitinggame of that morning started.... ofcourse first with a "koffie verkeerd" or as one says in English , Italian, etc "Caffe Latte" and from around 9.20 I started to keep check on both sliding doors at arrivalhall no 3... standing on my toes, then looking between all these other people and looking, looking, looking.... and passsengers comming out..... chinese looking, thai looking finally passed trough the slidingdoors, then the crew of China Airlines came out, themn more passengers, but no Kik.
I thought, O No, not again!..... Getting pretty tired, remember I had a short night after several other short nights (one can get excited about something I believe) ... also getting a little bit annoyed not knowing what was wrong, and see all thse happy reunions taking place all around me, the enthousiastic welcoming of all these loved ones by their loved ones....
And there I was, in the middle of that all, with my two balloons, still waiting.
at 10.30 I walked over to the airport informationdesk to inquire, were the guy told me that CI65 would be off the luggage in 7 minutes so give my friend another 15/20 minutes and then the last passengers should have left the area of the luggage arrivals into the arrivalzone... Okay, so I waited till 10.50, No Kik!!
Walked back to tha airport information desk, told them I was waiting for my friend and fiancee to arrive from Thailand and that something must be terribly wrong and if they could ask at pasportcontrol, customs etc, to find out if they were holding a thai nationality with the the name Chaladkid. Very understanding they made , I believe 5 phonecalls to all different stations, but at none of them they were holding a thai nationality, ergo, no Kik. Okay, I thought, up to the departurehall to check with China Airlines... nobody there, grrrrr. A, I saw aphonenumber, I dialed and asked if there had been a Chaladkid on the passsengerlist...after checking twice the answer was rather surprising: No, none!
Not knowing what happend I walked downstairs again contemplating what to do next.
Down the stairs, not far from were I had my cofffee several hours before I saw Wil sitting and just receiving her drink. Wil is one of the two people I meet allmost every saterdaymoring for coffee, tea, hot chocolate in Delft, and we often then also enjoy a small lunch together. She had told me, when I announced that the 12th I could not be present due to Kiks arrival, that she would be at the airport as well, waiitng for her daughter to arrive from South Africa.
She saw me, and quickly asked the waiter to hold and offered me coffee, which by that time I could really need, hehe.
We started chatting, thought I keep her company till she meets up with her daughter, then I say: what the heck, I call him on his mobile in Bangkok, from my mobile here straightaway.
Ring ring ring ring...and a very sleepy voice, unclear answers. "is this Kik?" I ask, a muffeled respons, again I ask "Is this KIk??!!" "Yes, this is Kik, who is this ?" (clearly he didn't look at his screen when answering) I say Rob, waiting for hours at airport for him... but also relieved to know that at least he was okay.
Ofocurse he said I was stupid, because he would arrrive on the 13th not the 12th. But I told him he had said to me he would leave on the 12th, and so I expected him to arrive on the 12th as well..... then some Thai logic: Well, in Thailand you call it the 12th still (no idear when but clearly much later in he night then we are used to here) when you leave at 2.30 am in the morning, though officially its the 13th.
I told him I would talk to him later and hang up, but also relieved that all was inded well, and nothing had happened!
Wil and I had to laugh about this . lets say misunderstanding. Then her daughter appeared in front of her and they were reunited as well...at least one thing that went pretty okay that morning!
We both left for the exit....walking back to my car with those balloons without companion..... lonely for sure but my heart was still excited about Kiks arrrival, though now I had to drive there again and who knows what would be awaiting me then......
well in a couple of hours I know, because again I am up early, unable to get back to sleep again aand in an anticipating mood.
I check my comp, indeed, it is the 13th, hehe, so today all should go perfectly okay ... lets see how okay all will turn out to be!

O, and the balloons, they will await Kiks arrival now at home in Delft. And I will bring only a simple little bunch of sunflowers with me to the airport :-)))))))))

Getting the Jitters... 3 months till W-day!

Picture on the right:
Will he indeed be able to officiate our wedding?
Find out latest the 8th of October ;-)

Or whatever one says in english!
Today its exactly 3 months till our weddingday, on the 8th of October and still so much to do....one wonders what I have been doing these past weeks/months, well mostly thinking about how to organise it, and only taking care of the most necessary items.
Highly necessary to do before Kik arrives in Holland, which will be saterday or roughly 36 hours from now:
- Reserving weddingdate of 8th of October at the citizens affairs desk of the city of Delft;
- Asking the Imigration and Naturalisation Service (IND in Dutch) if they will allow me to marry Kik. They will check if it is not a fake wedding, which you as reader and I ofocurse now it is not;
- Location of marriage, the old Cityhall of Delft. More and more people like to marry on a location of their desire, but this wonderfull 17th century cittyhall is too beautifull to pass over as a location to get married and its high time a Vermeer marries again in Delfts cityhall again anyway;
- We can choose max 4 witnesses, but one witness I had to ask sometime ago allready because otherwise the chance would be to big he wouldn't be able to make himself available again. Due to his high profile at this moment in time I will not reveal his name here now; The other 3 witnesses I will choose together with Kik, because 2 of them will be his, and 2 mine... so we must decide these other 3 together so we both will feel very comfortable with our choices of witnesses (by the way no obligation attached for attending the Thai marriage on the 23d of November). Sadly enough its practically impossible to have relatives and friends of Kik to come all the way from Thailand just for our wedding, hence I find it very important that the witnesses he chooses are more then 100% very pleasing choices for him ( at least his own 2 that is, haha)!;
- shortlist of places to celebrate our wedding, etc.;
- shortlist of possible guys (well ladies, no discrimination intended here) to make a possible recording and photoshoot of the event, so we can take that with us to show our thai relatives as soon as we get to Thailand again;
- a comfi gadget for our guests of the 8th as a token of appreciation as well as a momentum which actually might be usefull for them in the process;
- creating a list of guests, and who I actually allready pre-invited via mail and who I stil have to track down for that;
- a large supplpy of umbrella's in case it rains on the 8th, and thats a risk one runs in October for sure, but ofocurse we all hope for a wonderfull autumnday!!

Not much I know, but then, if all has gone well, our weddingsuits will have bene made in Thaland in a most revealing color, which, when I report about it here wil be more explained... but first I have to know if all went as planned in that area.... if not, a hunt for proper wedddingdresses will have to be added to the list of to-do things.

O, also, were in cityhall we will get married ... depending of how much people intend to atttend ofocurse and what suits the occasion best;-)

And where to cut the weddingcake and how its going to look like .....

Well, these last weeks I felt pretty awfull, being a libra its allready hard to make choices (specially in private matters, in business/volunteerwork I never had or have much trouble with that!) and so much to choose from, so mainly having been busy writing down what needs to be organised and done ;-)

Well, leave it with this little report for now, will get back to all of you soon enough I think ... first saterday I hope to collect Kik after he manages to pass past customs, hehe

take all good care!!

Kik's arrival in less then 5 days and 1 - 2 hours!!!

Saterday the 12th of july Kik will land at Amsterdam Airport, also known here as Schiphol and as you can notice in the heading, more or less counting down to that moment in anticipation.

Except that most of the organising of the wedding here in Delft wil take place after he has arrived, as well as my 'moving' to Thailand, I also plan to do some very different things here, hehe
Slowly the dinner engagements are getting lined up for the two of us, also I like to spend some true quality time with Kik and therefor I for one booked tickets for the Bolshoi Ballet... and no, not in Moscow, but here in Amsterdam. They perform once a year abroad, and after New York, and London, the now have Amsterdam on their schedule for 2008, and am so happy that I managed to get tickets for it (also read my blog "mpgsadventures" or Rob's adventures) for their 25th of july performance of Spartacus!
Its the best classsical ballet theatercompany I have ever seen, and I can only hope that they haven's lost anything of their magic and quality I was allowed to wittness in 1985 in Moscow twice!
Can only hope Kik will appreciate it just as much as I expect to do, specially because his proffesion is Thai classical dancing.... and he now will have a "first class' opportunity to compare western classical ballet with Thai classical ballet/dancing.

But more is being planned.... I also hope to have the chance to drive a little circle with Kik trough western Europe. Its the chance to do so, because we are here together for 3 months so one can ask himself when do we have a chance for some serious driving around Europe again? And with all the health problems we both encountered in our lives sofar, one can better go for the opportunity when it presents itself then putting it off till a later year ;-)
Depending on the real time available and ofcourse on input by Kik as well, the route wil be Amsterdam (Gaypride), visiting friends who just moved to Drenthe at Balinge (yea, for the non dutch readers: try to locate that one on the map, haha), then via Hannover to Berlin (hopefully hooking up with some guys we met in Patong Phuket), via Leipzig and Munich, trough Austria/Tirol and via one of the Alpes routes into Italy. If possible Venice, but Verona (if lucky maybe I can finally see their second act of Aida which I allways seem to miss out on due to rain at the end of the 1st act) will for sure be visited, then past the big lakes like Lake Como, and , as we say in Dutch "het Garda meer" around Milan (Kik is not keen on too much cities anyway) to Cannes, Monaco, Nice (the coast route) and then slowly going to the north again.... OR we might continue, depending on the time available, to Zaragossa in Northern Spain where we can visit the Expo and see and learn everything about water. Which could be very instructive for us when I think about the farm in Thailand we will have to take care off one day!!. Well, all in all I want to try to arrive in the midddel of France, between Marmande and Bergerac on the 16th latest 17th to celebrate there the birthday of my oldest friend Alan with his family and some other dear old friends. After which I hope we can proceed trough France up north, via Paris and then back to Holland and Delft.
This little circle trough western Europe I hope will not take more then roughly 3 weeks.... it can be made shorter depending on the time we still need to be decently prepared here for the October events. One advantage: Kik is not that keen on exploring cities, he's far more interested in countryside and nature hence I hope to show him a lot off all that in all its variations we have here in this part of the world.
OK, thats it for now, catch you next time again!!

rough program is getting ready!

Well, dear readers, I am happy to let you know that more and more the rough program of our weddingceremonies is getting ready... as well as in The Netherlands as in Thailand.

Well, on the 7th of October I hope to celebrate my 50th birthday, as the dutch saying goes: I'll hope to see Abrham ;-)
On the 8th of October, at 16.00 hours, Kik and I hope to say "yes" to eachother and from that moment on we will be lawfully married .... and the greatest part of it is that more and more countries are starting to recognize unions as ours... and hopefully in the near futur Thailand wil be one of them !!

ON the 9th or 10th we will leave Holland and fly down to Thailand together as a couple, yeaaahh!
There I'll bring Kik to the Temple of his choice to withdraw in it to prepare himself for our Bhoedist marriage. He wil do so for 23 days......... Kik was born in 2523 (the Thai follow the counting of the years folowing Bhoeda's death 2551 years ago ;-) and we chose the 23d of november for our weddingdate in Thailand!
Both our dates, the 8th and the 23d, have been settled after Kik had consulted his 'mother' in Bangkok. Do not confuse the word mother with our western understanding of it. In Thailand "mother" is used for wise (sometimes old) men who advice on all kinds of things in life of the Thai, like whats the best day to get married. Kik got the advice of his trusted mother in Bangkok and am myself happy to follow his advice in this!
The 11th of november was just as good, but Kik had preference for the 23d, because of his year of birth ... and am totally happy with it because I also like use of symbols, may it be dates, or otherwise ... its good, and most time makes you feel much more comfortable with it and so create your own good feelings and therefor most likely good omens as well.

I got a little bit shocked when Kik told me sofar they expect 900+ guest on the 23d of november ... a somewhat higher number of people then I expect to attend our civil wedding here in Delft, hehe

I will send out to all the poeple whom I have emailadres from, etc, the first pre-invitation, in dutc and in english, so everybody who want to come to either weddingceremony can let me know, and mid/end august I hope Kik and I can send out a printed invitation to all who reacted positivly. Mid october we'll also send a more specified invitation for the Thai weddingceremony.

The closer we get to all the dates, the more, sometimes crazy idears, hit my mind ..... lets se how crazy I'll become, haha

Well, when you read this and not sure if I have your emailadres and you want to stay or get involved in all of this, just drop a line and I keep you posted as far as it might be necesary!!

Take all good care!!

From happy to scared and back to happy again....

Thats how the rollercoaster of my feelings went these last weeks.
Not that anything was wrong between Kik and me. No, Kik suffers from backproblems for quite a while yet and was told by his docters at Phuket hospital that he had to go to Bangkok to exclude the possibility of cancer in his back! A somewhat different message then tendon/back problems which Kik was suffereing froom these last months.
Now me being here in Delft/The Nethrlands and Kik in Thailand made me at times go a little bit bananas from worry about what the situation was exactly, if Kik was following up as quickly as possble, etc.
Kik went last week to Bangkok and afterwards he travellled onwards to his grandparents farm in Udon Thani...where he stil is by the way!
Last weekend my worry got so big that I thought : If I do not receive any comforting messages from Kik the next couple of days then I am buying a returnticket to Thailand and go find out myself and support him where ever that might be necessary... because if theirs any chance on cancer its very important to start treatment asap so the chnces of recovvery are as big as can be in the circumstances.
Now, yesterday I called Kik again (we speak allmost every day on the phone these last weeks, logically) and in the background I heard happy chatter of his familly in Udon......... and then he told me: no cancer!
My God I allmost started to cry from relief and sheer happiness ... all kinds of doomscenario's had spooked trough my mind and all of a sudden they all just dissapeared!
Kik told me that he would go back to Bangkok on the 18th of june to visit the dutch embassy to get his visa settled for his 3 months stay in Holland. Also he told me that he needed to take care of his back and tendon very much and I concluded, without him contradicting, that most likely his dancing career had come to a halt if he wanted to be able to use his back for a while to come... he didn't disagree, which says a lot about his backproblems and the shoch he, and I, had received these past weeks.

Well, so since yesterday in a somewhat better mood, to put it mildly.... all is back on track and the preparations for marrriage is still fulll steam ahead, YIPPIEEEE (hahahaha)

(the pic inserted in this entry is of Kik in costume at Simon Cabaret, a month or so ago ... sorry you have to turn your head a bit, haven't yet discovered how to safe the rotation)

Officially engaged with the blessing of the Chaladkid-familly..

Or was it wellcoming Rob in the Chaladkid-familly as Kiks fiancee? Well, either way, on that day Kik became my official fiancee with the full blessing of his grandparents.

On New Years night, seconds (!!) after the year 2008 had started, I had asked Kik if he wanted to get married to me.... in The Netherlands........... A spontanious reply followed so beautifull and warm that I became even more aware that his YES was not going to be just a yes, but a yes which finds its origins deep within him... which made me more gratefull when he indeed finally said YES.

Now we allready had planned our trip to his home town near Udon Thani in North East Thailand, Si Bun Ruang, around his fathers birthday on the 20th of january. A wonderfull chance not only to get to know his familly, the area he grew up in, but also to get to know his grandfather and grandmother, and ofcourse the rest of the Chaladkid-familly who all still live there.

After 3 days spending with his familly, celebrating his fathers 50th birthday as well as going to a big Isaan-festival and enjoying the Isaan music and entertainment, on our last evening in Si Bun Ruang I/we were surprised with a welcoming ceremony in the Chaladkid family , which is also something like an official engagement with the blessing of the entire family, in his grandparents house. Not only allmost al the members of the Chaladkid-familly were present but also friends and neighbours. All in all I counted 30/40 people who watched and congratulated us after the ceremony was over and all of whom put white pieces of rope around Kiks and my wrists as that sign of welcomming.

So, the first step was taken less then a minute after the beginning of the New Year 2008, the second step, most likely more important, was taken on the 23th of January with this wonderfull symbolic gesture by Kiks family with which they agreed to give him to me in marriage!

KIk and I plan to get married around my 50th birthday in October 2008. And I promissed him that I would join him in Thailand to start a new life there together! A large task for both of us awaits us to make it all come together and build a fruitfull and prosperous life, for us and for the ones we deeply care about! A challenge most worthwhile to go for.
And this weblog might give all who are interested a glimpse of what work it involves for a Thai guy and a Dutch guy to start building a life together in, for the Dutch guy, a new, far away country.

I will try to record here as much of what happens on the road to the day of our legal Dutch marriage in October as well as the religious wedding in november in Thailand. And after that, our first months as a couple till we go back to The Netherlands to attend not only my nephews/godsons wedding, but for me also to officiate it on the 29th of may 2009.
It promisses to become a very interesting, wonderfull and adventurous year with our love to guide us trough it and will make us look back on it with pride and joy!